The first chapter of Ian McEwan’s novel Enduring Love is probably the one of the most stunning first chapters ever written. Besides being a great example of exceptional writing, it has a knuckle-biting, moral dilemma. A hot air balloon has broken away from its moorings, and a group of strangers try to prevent it from being blown away with its occupant, a young boy.
The dilemma for Joe Rose, the central protagonist, and the other men who have rushed to help, is when to let go. One man clings on after everyone else has given up, and the balloon is pitched into the air by a strong gust of wind. This last man eventually has to let go and dies.
“I didn’t know, nor have I ever discovered, who let go first,” says Joe. “I’m not prepared to accept it was me.” He is left with a gut-wrenching guilt, leading to brutal self-analysis and self-justification: “The child was not my child, and I was not going to die for it.”
Joe’s encounter with a fellow helper, the disturbed Jed Parry who develops an obsessive bond with him, almost wrecking his marriage and his life, provides the starting point for the remainder of the novel.
Preparation for Workshop:
Everyone should have read the entire first chapter and brought a piece of their writing to the workshop, maybe 300/500 words.
The tutor can choose a few paragraphs from this first chapter for close-reading and analysis.
Please note: This exercise could be applied to any other novel with a strong first chapter.
Discuss the Qualities that Inform McEwan's First Chapter
Discuss McEwan’s prose, his economy of style, pace, length of sentences, as well as the brilliance of this moral dilemma, juxtaposed as it is, with the gripping action.
Writing verb-driven narrative, means to use one strong verb instead of a weak verb and an adverb. It could also mean simply improving the verbs already chosen. Bear in mind, this does not mean that every verb has to be stunning. Too many strong verbs could make the prose appear heavy and unnatural. The reader must not be overwhelmed. For important verbs, it’s a good idea to find the best to fit the context.
Although superfluous words should be eliminated, see if you can find alternative words to deepen or intensify meaning.
For example, Ian McEwan says: “In John Logan… the flame of altruism must have burned a little stronger.” How much more effective than simply saying “John Logan was brave.” In this instance, the extra words do their job, make the prose more intense, more felt.
A stronger, more specific assessment of John Logan’s state of mind than simply writing “… holding on weakly,” are McEwan’s actual words: “…all his energies concentrated in his weakening grip,”
On the final page of the first chapter, the contradiction between fear and its disintegration into confused laughter is easy for us to identify with, imparting a feeling of empathy in the reader. These flashes of understanding make McEwan's writing believable.
Writing Exercise:
Consider: If you’re tempted to add an adverb to a verb, then would a stronger verb improve the impact of the writing? Editing prose into its minimum wordage, while using the best possible language, helps writing flow.
The wordage you save on unnecessary adverbs may give you more scope for experimental language, for example, metaphors. Although – don’t let too much descriptive writing slow down the action.
Take a piece of your early writing and transform it by turning it into fast-paced, exciting verb-driven narrative.
Share Results
Read the results with the rest of the workshop, including self-analysis and feedback.
Sources
McEwan, Ian. Enduring Love. Jonathan Cape, 1997.
Janet Cameron - MA. Cert.Ed. is a retired university lecturer and author of twelve books, women's short fiction and a magazine column.
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